What a weekend….

And I am exhausted. To the point where I get even more tired just thinking about trying to list out all we did this past weekend, let alone word-smith it into something interesting. So instead, I will just point out the lesson learned and remembered this weekend:

1. St. Patrick’s Day is Amateur Night at the bars. Seriously people, step aside and let the pro’s handle the drinkin on this day. The rest of y’all just stay home. PLEASE.
2. Guitar Hero on PS2 is NOT for people who actually know how to play a guitar. Nor is it for drunks with poor reaction time and bad hand/eye coordination.
3. When playing golf, any spur of the moment contests will always hold a prize you DO NOT want to win.
4. If you DO end up winning, choose to buy the first round, regardless of how much it will cost… because if you take the cheap way out it will bite you in the ass.
5. People talk BIG, but rarely follow through. This resulted in our group sitting around a strip club WAITING for something to happen rather than making it happen.
6. Lap dances are not sexy. In fact it is impossible for me not to laugh at the absurdity of them.
7. Strip clubs are sad sad places that hold no life and smell bad.
8. Though gaudy as all hell, stretched Excursion limousines are the way to go for a group of 20 people. I had more fun in the limo than I did in the club!
9. Breakfast with my parents is nice. Add my sister to the equation and I no longer have any patience or tolerance for anything.
10. Corned beef, cabbage, mashed potatoes, and rhubarb pie fixes everything.

Now it is time to prep for next weekend’s jaunt up to the bay. I have hired an executive car to take myself and Raz to the airport which should be the perfect way to start the trip: in style!

Once we land on Friday, we should be grabbing some lunch then heading over to the seminars for registration and some nice seated tastings. thejamez shoot me an email and we’ll schedule a lunch or dinner, or just meet up at the tasting if you are able/or have already bought tickets…. My addy is on my user info page…

5 thoughts on “What a weekend….

    1. OK… lets see if I can keep this short but informative 🙂

      I “won” a hole during our 9 rounds of golf on Saturday which was called out as “Closest to the hole wins”. Turns out that off the tee, I drove the ball to within 17 feet of the hole, while the next closest was out at 24 feet. I won. Whoo hoo. Mind you I am not that competitive when it comes to golf, as I find it to be much more of a team sport and we were out with friends just to have fun (which we did). Of course, when I found out that I had “won” a lap dance from the ugliest, fattest, ethnic stripper in the club we would find ourselves at later, I was even less competitive.

      Fast forward to that night, and I think they have all forgotten. I had been offered to decline the lap dance if I bought the first round of drinks at the club, but I never gave them an answer in the hopes that drunken forgetfulness would save me. (After all, we had a group of 20! The first round would have been EXPENSIVE!).

      And then, I feel breasts on the back of my head and my world collapsed. I feared turning around to see what they had bought me. Let me just say, she wasn’t “fat”, but she was very ethnic and had the biggest ass in the place. And she knew exactly how to play our group and make me as uncomfortable as possible. Luckily for me, it was one of the shortest lap dances that night. Everyone, including Jean, were laughing their own asses off, as it was explained to me later that “when she’d shake it, her ass would clapping like a walrus”. I wouldn’t have known, as my eyes were either closed, or staring her square in the eyes trying not to look anywhere else.

      So yeah, don’t “win” when you play golf with this group of friends… Lesson learned.

      1. Ohhhhhhh, wow, *snicker* Sorry to laugh at your pain, but that’s really quite funny!

        Thanks for my first laugh of the day!

        1. Oh, no don’t be sorry… I went with it because, well it really IS all about the funny. I figured it would be a good laugh for everyone. 🙂

  1. Weekend, yes.

    All sorts of tricksiness going on my life right now. Which is to say the seminar probably won’t work out for me. However I still live here, and you’ll still be in town, so we’ll hopefully get together on Friday.

    I popped you a note, so write back when you can.

    I’m looking forward to it.

Comments are closed.