Not surprising, I am sure.

This entry was posted by on Monday, 12 June, 2006 at

Sitting in the theater this past weekend a thought occurred to me, which lead to another realization, which seems to have left me with a decision I can not change:

As the movie started, I thought to myself, ”man I wish I this was on DVD so I could pause it, tell the projectionist to actually dim the lights, and then tell the other 3 families with small children to kindly –shutthefuckup-..”. Too bad it wasn’t on DVD, where I would be in the comfort and control of my own home and able to watch a movie, in its entirety, without being disturbed by a crying child, random people talking, or the constant rustling of snack bags over important dialog. No, instead I sat for two hours trying very hard not to rip peoples’ heads off and enjoy the movie.

What movie you may ask? Well, Jean and I went to see “The Omen” on Sunday afternoon. While not crowded by any stretch, there were indeed enough people in the theater to nearly make us walk out and find a different location. Now, normally, I wouldn’t do this. However this one was special. You see at least three families decided that “The Omen” would be the perfect Sunday matinee for their children, of which were all under the age of seven. TWO of these kids were still in prams. Two others wouldn’t shutthefuckup to the point where even the dad was telling them to be quiet (as a side not, how sad is THAT. I have to point out that even the parent was actually PARENTING!) Who in their right mind thinks a movie like “The Omen” is appropriate for anyone under the age of say, hmm, 18 like the rating committee has deemed with their “R” rating. Personally, I’d go as low as 15… still a far cry from the 4- 7 year olds in the theater, not to mention having two babies around such loud audio tracks.

To make matters even worse, about half way through the film, some punk-ass teenager a seat away from Jean starts asking questions about parts of the movie he doesn’t understand. This kid must have been retarded to be asking some of these questions… I won’t list them here so as not to spoil the movie for any of you whom have not yet seen it.

So, to put a point on this all, I don’t think I’ll be going to the theatre again anytime soon (if ever). People simply can’t be relied upon to be courteous and turn off their phones, let alone leave their crying/sniveling/constantly talking children at home. When exactly did the “Don’t talk during the movie” courtesy go by the way-side and when did asking perfect strangers retardedly obvious questions during the movie become acceptable?

I’d much rather rent the DVD, crank my own sound system, and relax on my own couch without being disturbed by the dis-courteous masses at the multi-plex. Besides, that way I get the director’s cuts and extras too. It’s a win-win!

20 Responses to “Not surprising, I am sure.”

  1. And your popcorn is not burnt!

  2. Well, there are no guarantees there… Just ask Jean 😉

  3. Shush, you. That was a legitimate mistake.

  4. I have a friend who only goes on weekdays, for all the reasons you listed. I find the Friday night at 10pm show cuts down on a lot of the kid problems, and most of the folks seem to be polite in that crowd.

    But yah, Sunday matinee is definately a crapshoot 🙂

  5. I figured we’d at least skirt the kid issue with “The Omen”… I was wrong. Assuming there are any other films out that I want to see, I think you’re right, the late show it is!

  6. Late show on a week night – or a matinee during school hours.

  7. I hear ya, but the problem lies in the fact that we both work 8a-5p jobs (realistically I get to work at 7:15a). A 10pm show on a “school” night gets painful the next morning. (I just can’t party like a rock star anymore 🙁 ) And while that gets past the children issue, there are still id10ts with their cellphones and lack of common sense/courtesy to contend with.

    Honestly, not going to the movies is really NOT a chore for me. It is a CHORE to get me out to them in the first place.

  8. Very true, “Fastest Replier in the West!”

    Lately there hasn’t been anything good at the movies anyways.

  9. Boredom at work results in me checking personal email 2,505,437 times a day… and you are sooooo right, no good movies at all really.

  10. Yep…you’re in for it…

    Nothing to do now but go out and buy the 50-inch plaz and the liquid cooled sub-woofer. Pump up the volume and give your uptight neighbors something else to worry about while they shiver and stare at Lenore.

    *rubs palms together wickedly*

  11. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    well, outside of the largescreen plasma, I already have the sound system 🙂 Nice Yamaha receiver pumping MEGA-power into my Bowers & Wilkins towers, center, and sub…. YUM. My sounds equals that of the theater, now I gues I do just need the big screen. Think Jean will spring for it?

  12. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    If you decide to go Panasonic on plazma or lzd, give me a call – I can get you friend & family discount iz pozzible. may not be best discount out there, but iz conziztently gude.

  13. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    Oh, and if you want to go seriously goofy – Panasonic has a new 103″ plasma display available now… it’s a bit pricey, admittedly… but combine it with the Wilson WAMMs and Krell dual mono amps, and you won’t have to worry about hearing the neighbors complain…

  14. Yea, I’m more then a little surprised that some moron parents would take their child to see “The Omen”. I saw “South Park” in theaters opening night and a woman had her 2 kids with her. They OBVIOUSLY conned her into it because by the end of “Uncle Fucker”, they were gone.

    People just have no idea what they’re doing.

    We also try and catch weekday showings of movies, mostly the Midnight shows on a movie that is a new release. Mainly because the people at that show WANT to enjoy the movie!

    WE’re hoping to have our living room done by Xmas so I can just watch movies at home too. I love going, but the expense itself is starting to be ridiculous… and this is coming from ME!

  15. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    Oh as it stands I don’t hear the neighbors 🙂 I am, admittedly, not a visual movie buff, but rather an audiophile. My system attests to that. I have a Yamaha receiver and B&W speakers tuned for 2-channel audio and Dolby Pro-Logic for movies, but a measely 32″ Sony Wega from 1999/2000. Small screen but BIG sound! Honestly, I don’t think I could fit a much larger screen in my house… but rest assured I will keep you in mind if I decide to upgrade my visuals 🙂

  16. Don’t EVEN get me started on the expense… the MATINEE was $7.50! Now, when I can buy the movie on DVD for the cost of 2 matinee tickets, well lets just say it is even MORE reason to stay home.

  17. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    Yes, I think one of those spontaneous trust funds is in order. Can’t she have one?

    Can’t we have one too?

    I’d buy everyone a three million inch plazma if I could just have one of those spontaneous trust funds.

    And a monkey, and a perfect body, and a perfect soul, and and and….

  18. Re: Yep…you’re in for it…

    OOOH! A monkey… yes I need a monkey too!

  19. I hate (vehemently) the situation with R-rated films out here as far as parents bringing in kids is concerned. I remember when Lisa and I went to see “Blade 2”, which has gore aplenty, and there was a couple of parents in their late 20s/early 30s with two children, the oldest of which (a boy) was 5 at the most. The poor kid was obviously scared out of his wits throughout the whole thing, and despite the fact that he cried every time there was blood or a scary moment, they still stayed until the end…

    In the UK, you don’t get in to an 18-certificate (equivalent of an R) film unless you are 18 or older, simple as that. Of course, that would never happen over here because the studios want to make big bucks off whoever comes in with a parent/guardian.

    What will be interesting is how distribution of new films ultimately gets taken care of, in the anti-piracy age. It could well be that we go the same way as has been happening in some of the Asian market, where a movie is available to buy as a no-frills/extras DVD on the same day as it is released in the theatre. I’d definitely be interested in that!

  20. as has been happening in some of the Asian market, where a movie is available to buy as a no-frills/extras DVD on the same day as it is released in the theatre.

    I would DEFINITELY go for that!


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