Sitting in the theater this past weekend a thought occurred to me, which lead to another realization, which seems to have left me with a decision I can not change:
As the movie started, I thought to myself, ”man I wish I this was on DVD so I could pause it, tell the projectionist to actually dim the lights, and then tell the other 3 families with small children to kindly –shutthefuckup-..”. Too bad it wasn’t on DVD, where I would be in the comfort and control of my own home and able to watch a movie, in its entirety, without being disturbed by a crying child, random people talking, or the constant rustling of snack bags over important dialog. No, instead I sat for two hours trying very hard not to rip peoples’ heads off and enjoy the movie.
What movie you may ask? Well, Jean and I went to see “The Omen” on Sunday afternoon. While not crowded by any stretch, there were indeed enough people in the theater to nearly make us walk out and find a different location. Now, normally, I wouldn’t do this. However this one was special. You see at least three families decided that “The Omen” would be the perfect Sunday matinee for their children, of which were all under the age of seven. TWO of these kids were still in prams. Two others wouldn’t shutthefuckup to the point where even the dad was telling them to be quiet (as a side not, how sad is THAT. I have to point out that even the parent was actually PARENTING!) Who in their right mind thinks a movie like “The Omen” is appropriate for anyone under the age of say, hmm, 18 like the rating committee has deemed with their “R” rating. Personally, I’d go as low as 15… still a far cry from the 4- 7 year olds in the theater, not to mention having two babies around such loud audio tracks.
To make matters even worse, about half way through the film, some punk-ass teenager a seat away from Jean starts asking questions about parts of the movie he doesn’t understand. This kid must have been retarded to be asking some of these questions… I won’t list them here so as not to spoil the movie for any of you whom have not yet seen it.
So, to put a point on this all, I don’t think I’ll be going to the theatre again anytime soon (if ever). People simply can’t be relied upon to be courteous and turn off their phones, let alone leave their crying/sniveling/constantly talking children at home. When exactly did the “Don’t talk during the movie” courtesy go by the way-side and when did asking perfect strangers retardedly obvious questions during the movie become acceptable?
I’d much rather rent the DVD, crank my own sound system, and relax on my own couch without being disturbed by the dis-courteous masses at the multi-plex. Besides, that way I get the director’s cuts and extras too. It’s a win-win!